What should mentors focus upon? Work on mending habits and personalities of mentee. To upgrade them to be agile, focused, accomodative and adaptable. To understand and help in creating right habits and engage their time to deliver and prioritize. To accept new things with open mindedness leading to transformation earlier and leading to progress. Reluctance only pushes the destination farther. Skills will perish with time and newer skills will be born. Adaptability to new trends and reducing turnaround time in learning are the key to survive and thrive in the new world.
We women got to learn to respect each other before commanding respect from the society and other gender or the younger crowd. Mother in law – Daughter in law, Manager – subordinates or Peers. We only have sympathy to give to another woman. Hardly do we appreciate another woman, accommodate her self respect, right attitude and motivate her. We always want to pull out the flaws of an other woman, despise upon her, knowingly allow her take the wrong path, get along with people who envy her, gossip about her, bring down her morale and doubt her confidence. We should not get along with others in commenting on an other woman, we should not be a part of insulting, or speaking about an other woman’s character, or despising upon her just because she is beautiful or successful or carries herself well.
There are many women who feel good by seeing the pain of an other woman and wants to keep them pinned down there. Such women go an extra mile in proving their dis-integrity towards womanhood. We lend a shoulder or give an ear when she is at her lowest. We don’t want to see her at the top and appreciate her for being there. If a woman is successful, and we see anyone trying to pull out her negatives, we get along, make apprehensions, spread it more than her success – which is the sole truth. Irony of our Psychology is, we glorify our action for supporting some one crying than seeing to that no one cries. That is the reason for why we stand where we stand. We haven’t given a demonstration of how we need to be respected to the people around. The battle to be won is not with others at all. It is within us with us. Appreciate one woman every time you find something nice about even if the action needs deliberation, look up at her, behave deaf to anything spoken against her. Show integrity towards your kind.
Justify your existence wherever you are. As an employee perform and be integral, as a husband or wife do justice to all your commitments towards your family members and show integrity. As a parent raise your child in a righteous manner. As a friend stand by the other and give sincere opinions. Make a difference with your presence and contribution. Being a passive personality doesn’t justify the very fact that you exist. Your purpose of being born and staying alive needs justification.
Most men always want to give a shoulder or lend a hand to a woman. This is the culture we have followed since childhood . So, most of the ego clashes which they have with women are, how can she be more intelligent than me or independent to an extent of not needing me? Most of the times the fights are not because she is wrong. But because its proved that she is right. And the argument goes like, “She thinks she is always right.” Rather, there are minimal efforts to raise their intelligence levels. There are only attempts to subdue the other.There are attempts to despise upon her by making fun of her or nastily commenting. But on the other hand, men want a working woman who can financially contribute to the family without carrying the confidence and pride of supporting the family. She should not be earning more than the husband, and more successful than him career wise. Even if she is earning more, she should not carry the pride of earning more and the financial control should be in the husband’s hands. If she is better capable too, she should make the compromises on her career when she has to opt between career and family responsibilities. You hardly see cases where any man taking a sabbatical and the woman working during the time when it comes to raising children or looking after parents. Have we started raising our sons to give equal opportunities for their wives? Not yet. We will realize this when our daughters are the support system and more ambitious in a family.
Modern, yet a hypo critic society. Ideology conflicts.
There is nothing called as perfect parenting. Every parent struggles with their first child. Lives in fear and inhibitions about being right or wrong. Most of the parents are either overcautious or very relaxed while raising the second or third. Which action or no action of yours will lead to favorable or unfavorable outcome is a very uncertain scenario. What are the influences, threats, fancies he has can’t be judged in a linear thought. His strengths, efforts, confidence about certain things aren’t measurable with clarity all the time. His likes, dislikes aren’t predictable in different phases of life. To add to all of it, there are hormonal changes which make the assumptions more fluctuating. Their ambitions, skills, interests, focus are basis their instincts towards their dreams, fantasies or observations. How much to speak and hear is not dependent on what we can take but on what keeps the child’s mind in good hygiene.
At one point of time, all parents regret of having been incorrect, principled, rigid, liberal, so on and so forth… Our own child, our blood and flesh, our genes and still we run through an emotional roller coaster ride while bringing them up.
So finally its all about keeping all your activities in a circle and not restricting it to a dot. And this circle will be created based on our parents inputs while raising us, observation from other parents, certain lessons learnt and certain principles followed. Any level of deviation is fine but within the circle.
Working women aren’t good Moms. True or false? Most of the Mom and Mom-in -laws have only one common complaint about their daughters/ in -laws that their grand child suffers due to the working moms. How true is this? Of course, the struggles for a working Mom are real. The child also is required to compromise on certain luxuries which he/she would have with a Mom around. But, dont we agree that, with a Mom around too, 70% of the times she would be handling house hold chores than spending time with the baby? If this isn’t convincing enough, the children of working women are independent, develop thinking process sooner, can handle situations without support, aren’t looking around to cling to someone always, understanding on balancing responsibility between career and family, prepared for future working wives, have better gender equality sense and better prepared to deal with life. I suppose, this is enough for a family to be less worried about their following generation.
Spreading happiness and gathering happiness are synonyms. I’ ve heard people say, I have lot of grief within me. Agreed. Stop trying to carry a need for sympathy on your mind. You can’t expect people to make you happy. You take the reigns. You will never complain of unhappiness when you make people around you happy. Unless you have a selfish reason, attention seeking habit or grieving habit. Spread happiness, motivate people to be happy. It doesn’t take much to be there. When you see smiles on faces and happiness in heart, you borrow a bit from there. So, the more you spread smiles, the more you will feel happy.
Hey Woman! You have always fought battles with all the people around, moved mountains, overcome insults and demotivation. All you have to remember through all of it and ahead is, You have gone through it to get stronger. So accept all of it happily. The world is working hard to make you better at everything by despising, demotivating, you.
Make the most of it. Bounce back every time. Stay Put. This would give you the greatest leap.
You don’t need anyone who would give you gender sympathy to drive you to success. Happy Women’s day to me and all the ones who are proud of being a woman !!
Everything is expected and accepted. NO OFFENCE! We need to appreciate ourself for all the transformation we have gone through. Child’s tantrums at all ages for incorrect demands, Society’s hypocrisy, Ill-treatment of spouse, Children turning out to spoilt brats, Our parents’ unreasonable behaviour towards us, Growing children turn insensitive to parents, Spouse’s/ Partner’s infidelity, Friend’s deceit, People’s ignorance or interference, Employees dis-integrity, Employers shrewdness, Colleagues tactfulness.
We have acceptance to all and expectations too under different circumstances. Perhaps, nothing seems grossly wrong. We justify, or they justify with the most genuine reasons and point of view which brings in a paradigm shift. What is the threshold in either cases? If we justify every individual from their point of view, will we ever have a proper definition for right and wrong? If yes, how would it be? The innocent, victim would suffer and the culprit will be free.
We had lot of simple moral science which we learnt at different ages in school or from our parents. Can they be adhered to? Should they be valued? Or is it just a way for people to run over you? Or does it allow a relaxation towards bending our rules for self benefit? All scenarios present.