Be your own guide…

Only thing to focus upon life is, where this path will lead me to. Not the stones or thorns of the path, not the companions who would or would not join you on the path, not the distance of the path and not the opinions of others on your journey.

-Sucheta Gour

The art of following up…


The moment you learn this art, you aren’t a nagging wife, an irritating Boss, an annoying parent or an impatient vendor.
Firstly,  acceptance to the fact that we all need follow ups at both ends.
Secondly, whether we are junior or senior, we aren’t computers, we will miss out on many a things though priorities.
Thirdly, patience in not getting exhausted by the following up process
Fourthly, at what intervals do we need to follow up.
Fifth,  the approach required, the words to be used, the content which can make the right impact.
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-Sucheta Gour

Adaptability and Flexibility…

Adaptability is so dominantly visible at every stage of our life. Yet, we have to come to terms with many aspects of our life. Especially when we have to adapt to many a things to be successful.

We aren’t trained to adapt to working for 9.5 hours after our graduation, travel 2 hours, cook or buy food for self for real long years, take responsibility of marriage and children. We kept changing and adapting in seconds, minutes, hours, days without reluctance, without sounding deliberate, accepting what seemed like a dream ,to a reality which turned out to be like the most normal way of living.

When it comes to job or career, we feel everything to be a rocket science, acceptance to even changing your workstation seems like a punishment, travelling to office like a roller-coaster journey, attending meetings like a herculian task, adapting to a client like a marriage with an alien.

Acceptance issues are too high. In spite of the best of our awareness, that’s the only way to grow, to meet our aspirations, to do better in our life, to cater to our daily needs and luxuries, we still want to behave ignorant towards the sole truth of all our lives. Why do have this indifferent approach?

-Sucheta Gour

Appreciating Women….

We women got to learn to respect each other before commanding respect from the society and other gender or the younger crowd. Mother in law – Daughter in law, Manager – subordinates or Peers. We only have sympathy to give to another woman. Hardly do we appreciate another woman, accommodate her self respect, right attitude and motivate her. We always want to pull out the flaws of an other woman, despise upon her, knowingly allow her take the wrong path, get along with people who envy her, gossip about her, bring down her morale and doubt her confidence. We should not get along with others in commenting on an other woman, we should not be a part of insulting, or speaking about an other woman’s character, or despising upon her just because she is beautiful or successful or carries herself well.

There are many women who feel good by seeing the pain of an other woman and wants to keep them pinned down there. Such women go an extra mile in proving their dis-integrity towards womanhood.
We lend a shoulder or give an ear when she is at her lowest. We don’t want to see her at the top and appreciate her for being there.
If a woman is successful, and we see anyone trying to pull out her negatives, we get along, make apprehensions, spread  it more than her success – which is the sole truth. Irony of our Psychology is, we glorify our action for supporting some one crying than seeing to that no one cries. That is the reason for why we stand where we stand. We haven’t given a demonstration of how we need to be respected to the people around. The battle to be won is not with others at all. It is within us with us.
Appreciate one woman every time you find something nice about even if the action needs deliberation, look up at her, behave deaf to anything spoken against her. Show integrity towards your kind.

-Sucheta Gour

Is there anything that is wrong?


Everything is always right for someone, somewhere at some point of time. It’s all about where we see things from OR should the statement be corrected as, we always rationalize things to suit our benefits?
There is an other version for it too. What is good for me is bad for someone else and vice versa.  It depends on each one’s point of view.
So finally, nothing is wrong or everything is wrong. Who gets to decide, who should decide and on whose behalf?
So many questions. Unanswered, or  answered but not convinced. However where does all this take us.

Into a deep well , a world which we have created to revolve only around us.

-Sucheta Gour

How can she be more intelligent than me?

Most men always want to give a shoulder or lend a  hand to a woman. This is the culture we have followed since childhood . So, most of the ego clashes which they have with women are, how can she be more intelligent than me or independent to an extent of not needing me?
Most of the times the fights are not because she is wrong. But because its proved that she is right.
And the argument goes like, “She thinks she is always right.” Rather, there are minimal efforts to raise their intelligence levels. There are only attempts to subdue the other.There are attempts to despise upon her by making fun of her or nastily commenting.
But on the other hand, men want a working woman who can financially contribute to the family without carrying the confidence and pride of supporting the family. She should not be earning more than the husband, and more successful than him career wise. Even if she is earning more, she should not carry the pride of earning more and the financial control should be in the husband’s hands. If she is better capable too, she should make the compromises on her career when she has to opt between career and family responsibilities. You hardly see cases where any man taking a sabbatical and the woman working during the time when it comes to raising children or looking after parents.
Have we started raising our sons to give equal opportunities for their wives? Not yet.
We will realize this when our daughters are the support system and more ambitious in a family.

Modern, yet a hypo critic society.
Ideology conflicts.

-Sucheta Gour

Be fair in LOVE…..

I failed to understand one thing strongly. I’ve seen people hating one person to prove his love to an other one.
You want to hate your Ex to prove your love to your fiance.
You want to hate your mother to prove your love to your wife and vice versa.
You want to hate your husband to prove your love to your child.
You want to hate one of your child to prove your love to the other child.
Why can’t their be love for both or neutrality towards the other or anger towards the one who is wrong and only for that instance. Why cant we emerge out to be wiser and mature?
We have come real far from logic and commonsense. Time to look back.

-Sucheta Gour

Acceptance levels – Exploring the Phases!!!

Everything is expected and accepted.
NO OFFENCE!
We need to appreciate ourself for all the transformation we have gone through.
Child’s tantrums at all ages for incorrect demands,
Society’s hypocrisy,
Ill-treatment of spouse,
Children turning out to spoilt brats,
Our parents’ unreasonable behaviour towards us,
Growing children turn insensitive to parents,
Spouse’s/ Partner’s infidelity,
Friend’s deceit,
People’s ignorance or interference,
Employees dis-integrity,
Employers shrewdness,
Colleagues tactfulness.

We have acceptance to all and expectations too under different circumstances.
Perhaps, nothing seems grossly wrong. We justify, or they justify with the most genuine reasons and point of view which brings in a paradigm shift. What is the threshold in either cases? If we justify every individual from their point of view, will we ever have a proper definition for right and wrong? If yes, how would it be? The innocent, victim would suffer and the culprit will be free.

We had lot of simple moral science which we learnt at different ages in school or from our parents. Can they be adhered to? Should they be valued? Or is it just a way for people to run over you? Or does it allow a relaxation towards bending our rules for self benefit?
All scenarios present.

-Sucheta Gour

Appreciate Challenges!!!

Life is all about appreciating self. And that’s only possible when you conquer challenges. So appreciate challenges.

-Sucheta Gour