Lost in detailing ?

Eye for detailing also needs a brain for ignoring….

Else unnecessary detailing in unnecessary areas might exhaust the bandwidth and delay the results.

-Sucheta Gour

Rejection – A catalyst for Success!!!

Rejection is the catalyst for your success,
the strongest ladder anyone can place between you and success.  Anyone despising you are the angels sent by God to keep your motivation to success throughout your journey.
Encash it well.
A girlfriend, boyfriend, spouse, friend, neighbour, boss, colleague, relative….anyone and everyone contributes in the same way to your success. Be thankful to all of them. Don’t lose sight of them.

– Sucheta Gour

Be The Queen!!!

Never be the bee who is sacrificed in the forefront.

Be the Queen who is planning her next move.

-Sucheta Gour

What drives you – Courage or Cowardice?

Some people show so much efforts in completing anything only to make the assignment seem tough. So is the assignment tough or the person less skilled. 90% of the times, its due to less skill, ignorance, overconfidence or under confidence about self. When we do not know to do something the best way, its general tendency to feel that the assignment is tough. How to deal is matter of self introspection. The only thing that needs correction is our self is a courageous statement. And everything needs correction is a statement for escapism and cowardice.

-Sucheta Gour

And the answer is “I LIVED”

What would be your answer to this question on your deathbed?
What did you do all your life?

We have many complicated answers towards which we have already worked enough till now.
I struggled to live a decent life.
I struggled with relations.
I overly labored out myself.
I stressed myself with anything and everything,
I fell short of time to live.
I was overworked with the responsibilities of life.
I complained about God and everyone around me.
I found everything in life too difficult to achieve or too easy and insignificant.

The answer can be straightforward if we start working towards it now?
And the answer is “I LIVED”

-Sucheta Gour

What are the ideal preachings Vs what they should ideally be?

No one is preaching on managing stress effectively. Everyone is preaching about running away from Stress. And in today’s world managing job, career, family, finance, Spouse (girl friend) and children is stressful. Well, If I’m not wrong, isn’t this everyone’s life story. Why are these basic responsibilities termed stressful activities?
So what are the ideal preachings Vs what they should ideally be.

Job stress – Take a break from work.Go on a vacation. Its ok not to give 100% to your job. Your physical and mental health is important.
Do not feel you are doing something great. 99.99% of the people have felt pressurized at work more than 80% of the times in their job. Everyone has the same story. Some do not glorify it, you do. Figure out gaps in your thought process, align them to make your job better ,speak to your friend/colleague for the right kind of advice and let that phase to pass by, but keep your efforts and positivity intact. Any job will have challenges. Learn to deal with them.

Career: Its ok if you do not grow in your career. All cannot aim at being Steve Jobs.
Everyone’s career should be important to them. Everyone should make an attempt to discover their maximum potentials. God hasn’t been partial when distributing knowledge or potentials.We have to make maximum use of it. How we used our potenials define our career path. Steve jobs also went through a lot to be there.So, if you are facing challenges. You are in the making of one more Steve jobs. So, go for the kill.

Family: Not everyone can be satisfied. You need not make your life hell to satisfy all your family members’ needs.
Family is an important part of everyone’s life. Keeping them happy is your basic responsibility. But set the right expectations about what they should expect from you. At the same dont feel guilty of not doing some thing.Showing love is not giving expensive gifts to your family. Care for them, love them. That should suffice.

Finance: Money isn’t everything. How much is enough can never be defined when it comes to money.
Still no one lends you a penny when you dont have any.
Money is a fuel to a good living, good education and secured old age.Let us accept.There is nothing wrong in striving to earn it. Let us work towards earning money without creating stress about did I earn enough? Let us not have this approach of “grapes are sour”. We know we have to earn enough. Let us systematically plan, ethical earn, cautiously spend and wisely save it.

Spouse: Women are nagging and very emotional, men are boaring and insensitive. Their expectations and demands are sky high. So ignore them or try your 1000% efforts to satisfy them.
Keep the balance. Be verbal about your feelings because most relations are stressed because of lack of communication. Love and respect each other enough to build understanding. Accept, you aren’t twins. You are two different individuals with different likes and dislikes. You are bound to disagree or fight. You did that with your parents and siblings. Treat the differences the same way. No one is going to award you on winning a battle or proving yourself right.Keep the love for each other intact. Stop asking why he or she does this to me. The other side also has same questions probably on different contexts.

Children: What they do, what they are learning, with whom they are, what will they be, do they have everything I didnt have. What else i can do so that they have a comfortable life, love me, idealise me and respect me.
Dont stress yourself with these thoughts.Build a good bonding so that the child reveals about their activities, friends and plans. Be cautious, track your child to certain extent, but remember, you arent God.You cant know everything, be everywhere, do everything right all the time. Stop trying to become an ideal parent. Bring in acceptance about you in your child, give right values and strong ethics. Reiterate.
Keep them occupied in constructive activities and in a right environment. Stop feeling guilty.

If we complain of all the lives best of the things and unavoidable things as stress factors, then we have to become a saint and meditate. Irony is,  we will be stressed with that too.

Sucheta Gour

Did we ever give our child a target of 35%, or being an average child? Did our parents do so?

Did we ever give our child a target of 35%, or being an average child? Did our parents do so?
Most of us didn’t go through this or didn’t do so.
It is a paradox that while we want our child to excel in all the subjects, score above 60 or 70 mandatorily, participate in co-curricular activities, as adults we aim at just being average in performances in our organization.We expect without reciprocation.We want people to be driving us.We don’t want to take our responsibilities.We want to say we know it all.But we want to do just what is required and nothing beyond that. We fear we will be asked to do much more. The reason we give to ourselves and others is work – family balance being distorted. And at home we portray our jobs eat up all our time. Isn’t the child’s study- family balance disturbed when we expect him only to study. So if that could be balanced, why cant we balance this too.

We expect to do as less work as possible with utmost glorification, and maximun financial gain. Where did we adopt these shorcuts? In which phase of our life and why are we stuck there? Why did less become more when it came to efforts and why did more become less when it came to gains?

-Sucheta Gour

Did we grow up or not? Or is it growing up for convenience?

Split approaches or Hypocricy?
We are too good at expecting and blaming end.Too bad at the opposite end.
We want discipline in our children
We complain about following discipline in the company we work, traffic rules. We bombard our children for not doing homework, not being consistent. We want lineancies in presentation or report submissions deadlines and consistency in performance. Did we grow up or not? Or is it growing up for convenience?

Sucheta Gour

Are we still wondering why a woman needs to be respected and cared for?Am I sounding feminist?

The greatest favour a man does to a woman is marrying her , accepting her and giving her his name.
The greatest of the favours a woman does for a man is sacrificing her whole life for him , her wishes, her identity, her dreams, her ideologies, her family, her name, her likes, her innocence, her independence,  the child in her so on and so forth….
Are we still wondering why a woman needs to be respected and cared for?
Am I sounding feminist?
But Im not .I’m a mother , a woman who doesn’t like distinguishing between a son and daughter.
Teach your daughters to not do so many favours.
Else your investlment of time, money and efforts in bringing up your daughter all goes in vain. She is not carrying anything of you. If she is a good wife, that’s because her husband is good and not because you raised her well. Her education isn’t useful to her which you spent a bomb on because her career isnt given importance. Her identity is all because of her husband and you don’t have any existence in her life. You are just a guardian till she reached her destination. You are none to her according to the society we have built.

-Sucheta Gour

Happy Independence day!!

Adopt Independence from all the harmful thoughts and actions like enmity, jealousy, selfishness, hostility, distrust, antagonism, ill-will, bad-mouthing, destructive thinking, over-assumption, lack of confidence, laziness, poor focus, lack of purpose, lack of persistence, procastination.
From the chains fastened around your mind and soul.
Happy Independence day!!

-Sucheta Gour