“You are very ugly,” “You can’t achieve this in your life.” “You are dumb.” “You are dark, fat…etc…,” Dont listen when someone comments on you, Ignore it. Its demotivating to hear unappealing and hurting comments. But I say…. Listen to them. Record it and keep on your mind.They can act as a fuel for your success. The obstinancy with which you want to prove them wrong works towards actually to overcome your weakness.That’s the reason why we mention it even in future when we overcome it, when we are successful. And we do remember both… the statement about us and the person who made it. How can such valuable statements being ignored?
But then there are majority of oeople who go into depression on hearing something negative about themselves. Trait of a weak mind. And they get into a war with the person or avoid meeting him/her. It’s only the perspective to use everything for self benefit that keeps us on track.
If we were self driven, we never required a school, teachers, peers, exam, a company, a job, a boss, a society etc…, All of these intentionally or unintentionally have droven us to be successful in different phases of lives.
If we want to claim we don’t care for any of these, then why are we worried about our image and impression, results, reputation with all the above.
A person can never know his mistakes until he doesnt have the courage to hear the truth about himself. Further, a person can never correct his mistakes unless he takes the truth about himself positively. To avoid depression, if truth is avoided, improvement is also avoided.
Adopting a designation or adapting to the role? Which is faster?
I often hear people saying ‘ I want to be a Manager, or AGM or VP. ” Also justifying the reason to be in a senior role with the years of experience one had. I rarely see people fancying a role and saying ‘ I can see these gaps and I want to analyse , develop better, view and implement certain strategies based on my experience or observing my Manager. I want to work seamlessly 12 hrs for developing myself. I want to sacrifice my fun and spare time to learn and adapt.I want to take the ownership of deliverables”
People adopt the designation sooner than roles. The shift to designation is in a day and to the role will take years.The ones who can identify and reduce this Turn around time is the one who is sincere and worthy of the role.
Fear of failure avoids overconfidence. Fear of failure forces you to put more efforts. Fear of losing someone makes you workout and care for a relation. Fear of rejection makes you groom and present yourselves well. Fear of sickness and ill health makes you workout and have better health. Fear of losing a deadline or a committment makes you work hard on your job. Fear of death pushes you to enjoy life today.
How can anyone dislike fears or fear fears. They are the fuel to progress and well being. Intensify your fears and channelise them in a right direction. They can do wonders for you.
You can’t be in ruins with a justification that I’ve come too far or someone drove me here.
In the first place, if you have to say I’ve come too far, where is it leading you to becomes an important question to answer. What are your gains and losses of being there is the second question.
And if you want to blame someone else for driving you there, you were neverva kid or arent a kid to be droven somewhere without your consent. No one will justify the reason or sympathise you for such lame reasons. No one will stay guilty for what they do to you. They will reason it out with their justification to overcome their conscience.
There is always a return ticket. And wiser ones will chose it.
Do you ever give an explanation? When we give explanation to others, are we actually giving an explanation to them? No we arent. We are actually explaining to ourselves because we are not able to carry the guilt ourselves and we are justifying our own conscience.
There are many Mantharas of Ramayan to poison your mind. But dont try to become Kaikeyi and create Ramayan. We always hear people poisoning minds against friends, relatives, parents or spouse.How strong a personality we are can create balance in the relationships. No lives are alike. All are different.Try to improvise lives of our near and dear ones with the feedback you receive from others. Alongside teach your dear ones to take the feedback positively too. But, do not punish them.
On the other side, do not become Dhratarashtra of Mahabharata and be the reason for the destruction of your near and dear ones. Only you can correct them. Rest of the world will only pass a comment, make fun of them, make advantage of their weakness or lead them to further ruins. If you genuinely care for them, keep your efforts on and on in making them better with time.
Everyone choose their battles, their enemies and design their battlefield and fight it out. Only difference is few are struck with unworthy battles or insignificant people or with How do I win over my mother in law today? How to take control of my husband? How do I overpower my colleague? How do I deal with my girlfriend? How do I tackle my manager?
And few others are fighting real battles like How do I build a great career? How do I manage the investors? How do I deal with all the challenges and grow my company? How do I fight the negatives? How do I win over my false ego? Choose your battles and enemies wisely, Wasting time, energy and life on petty issues is a shame to our potentials. We are more stronger than we assume to be.
When anything goes wrong, the first question many ask God is “why me?” Its very easy to answer this question. It is you now and it is someone else tomorrow. Everyone have their share and turn of difficulties and problems sooner or later. The degree of intensity of these problems vary for different people at different times. Just because few dont glorify them, doesn’t mean they hurt them less.And fewest of the lot are so strong that they are so busy finding the solution to the problem that they make the problem itself feel meagre.
So choose to chill. Its ‘OK’ to have problem. Life doesn’t end there. The problem is one among many. God isn’t at war with you. All of us are His darlings. He has the highest bandwith. So not His fault. He need not answer the question “Why me?” Everyone can’t be pleased always.Even God can’t please everyone always.
The next question is what about the disasters like someone lost their son at a very young age or their house is washed away in a flood or any other extreme condidtions. Certain questions can’t be answered by us because we dont have the visibility to everything. The balance is created by God well because He has visibility to everything from where He is.So let Him plan all the lives and operate the world. We are too small a being to understand, justify or debate the logic. All I knew is His shots are bang on and perfect.